Premier Cruise Lines

SS Oceanic

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Operator: Premier Cruise Lines
Year Built / Last Refurbished: 1965 / 1988
Length / Tonnage: 782 / 38,772
Number of Cabins / Passengers: 569 / 1,132
Officers / Crew: International / International
Operating Area: Year round Caribbean

She was originally the OCEANIC, designed by Sun Line founder and Home Lines’ Executive Vice President, the late Charalambos Keusseoglou, to run as a two class liner on the North Atlantic and as a one class cruise ship to the Bahamas and the Caribbean. By the time her builders, Italy’s famed Cantieri Riuniti del Adriatico got her ready for delivery in 1965 there was no point in running her on the Atlantic...the Italy - Canada line by sea was dead and Italian Line’s new MICHELANGELO and RAFFAELLO were having a hard time filling their 1,775 berths (in THREE classes)...so Home Lines put their new beauty into full time cruise service...For years (at least until Carnival Cruise Lines introduced their SuperLiners HOLIDAY, JUBILEE and CELEBRATION, the OCEANIC was often mistakenly touted as the largest ship ever purposely built for cruising by many observers who would have known better if only they were really interested in ships and shipping rather than in trying to impress people who knew even less, an ignorance of ships tempered only by their justifiable lack of interest). Home Lines capitalized on this myth, neither bothering to correct the ill-informed...and a year after the ship’s initial publicity material announcing plans to use her as a transAtlantic liner in addition to using her as a cruise ship were tucked away to gather dust, Home Lines themselves propagated the myth calling her the largest liner ever built for cruising...They lied, of course...and my files have all the items in question to prove it....

Home Lines never bothered to remind anyone that their wondership was ever conceived as anything other than a cruise ship...justifiably and quietly adding that the OCEANIC was designed for cruise elegance...But look at that “Magrodome”..that trademarked name for the dome over her twin pools....Mr Keusseoglou dreamed that one up because it gets damn cold on the run to Montreal! Whatever her origin, the dual purpose liner OCEANIC won an amazingly large number of devoted fans over twenty years as Home Line’s flagship. When Home Lines had her she was a stunning ship and for years hardly any cruise ship then in service could touch her.

When Home Lines sold her to Premier Cruise Lines in the mid 1980s shiplovers like me trembled for this great beauty and, sad to say, our fears were justified...nay...as our recent stay aboard her proved....our fears were less than they should have been....Yes, the Italian love affair with linoleum continues here aboard the Star/Ship OCEANIC....but where some once mocked Italian liners for their linoleum decking within, they should see this ship now...This ship once beloved for the elegance of her decor and the excellence of her accommodations, now perhaps in an effort to childproof her, perhaps not....this ship now features a decor reminiscent of nothing more than public lounging and eating facilities at a modern airport...Formica and cheap decorative effects abound leaving me thoroughly agog and aghast at what her operators have decoratively wrought aboard this liner, once hailed for the sheer beauty of her appointments...

Where once the name of Escoffier graced a Grill Room where lavish buffets were served, a room conceived to also serve as a dining room for First Class passengers, the name Sunrise Terrace suggests a bright, airy room rather than the dim tomb of a space it is now...What a pity...this room was once prime shipboard “real estate” where elegantly dressed couples, foursomes, families and groups of friends - often beautifully and formally dressed - enjoyed that famous Home Line cuisine...herds of boisterous kids and their parents (or maybe shepherds is the word I want here) take food in this now dismal space located high up in the ship but still endowed with outstanding views over the ship’s bows. Minus the balloon shades and red velvet wall coverings, the room is shorn of any touch of class...offering instead the air of the cafeteria you’d find in any suburban American high school...and food of similar content and quality to boot...Hey...the “Big Red Boat” is “Family cruising”....and of course most kids don’t know good food and service and from the looks of the crowds I saw here...no one who had bought a ticket has ever been to Maxim’s...No one here seemed to know much or care much about food or service...though in fairness...THAT’s NOT WHY THEY CAME here...and it’s THEIR vacation, but my vocation that brought us together...and forgive them if they neither notice or care that they are well....never mind... you KNOW what I mean...

Because Premier Cruise Lines has so trashed what the OCEANIC was, so demeaned that vessel so lovingly handled by a firm who called her “A new dimension in luxurious and gracious living”, so distorted a ship created by the work of such talented people like Nino Zoncada. Gustavo Pulitzerm Mario Luzzati to mention only three of the 16 artists and architects named in Home Lines publicity material, I have no qualms about telling the truth about what I saw here. I find the Star/Ship OCEANIC graceless, tasteless and tacky...a loud exponent of the brash untalented and often the foul mouthed...and worse, she is a cash extractor, for everywhere in her public spaces you turn seem to be many and varied opportunities...no,.. DEMANDS....to spend money....

WELL, MARK, WHAT do you expect on a ship whose owners have always had a tie-in with cartoon developers...first being the “official cruise line” for Disney....and then when the Mouse decided to take to the waters, Premier linked up with Looney Tunes...Nope, it AIN’T the RITZ!

It was her Lido area, twin pools covered by a retractable dome that Home Lines so successfully used to market this ship on her cruises from wintry New York... Now known as the Riviera Pools, the adjacent lido area can host receptions for up to 900 people! Just forward is the Satellite Cafe...now part of the food service but once the classy Eden Roc... a cozy night spot when this ship had class...which she doesn’t now. The OCEANIC is now thirty-two years old...so she has no atrium, ships didn’t when she was built...but that aside...her owners have tried every trick in the book to make her every bit the equal of the MARDI GRAS, CARNIVALE, BRITANIS...only they seemed not to notice that those old timers are gone now, the first and third into layup, the middle ship into a successful career in the Aegean...Did they succeed in making her the equal of those fine sea-going ladies? It’s your call but OK I admit it...

EVERYTHING I saw aboard this ship appalled me with the exception of a couple of cabins...But give her some credit...Premier Cruise Line does not market to people like me...does not want people like me and you can be damn sure I never told them I was a travel writer before I showed up at the dock to go aboard. Well, where was I? Ah yes, PUBLIC ROOMS... she boasts...is that the word? Boasts a 600 seat show lounge...Called the Broadway Showroom it rose on the bones of the once graceful Italian Hall, a lounge conceived for First Class passengers and executed to the highest degree of taste and style...If you knew the ship back then and saw this room now I bet you will come away as disturbed as I did...Once the Aegean Lounge, the biggest single space on Lounge Deck is is now an abomination called the Lucky Star Casino...

With it’s own lounge/bar and the milky way gift shop “mall” within the confines of the space originally allotted to the Tourist Class Main Lounge , Premier sure has thought it out...Here Dad can shoot craps, Mom can pour coins into the slot machines, they can both play blackjack...while the ship is at sea teenage Sis can shop and all the kids can sit by in the Lucky Star Lounge sucking down “Smoothies”...listed in the April 1997 bar lists at $4.75 a pop! But hey, as the text for the Looney Tunes Smoothie reads.... “All served in a Souvenir Looney Tunes Slipper, which is yours to keep. Our non-alcoholic favorite for the young and young at heart. A creamy blend of ice cream. Yum! Yum!” Nine other smoothies at the same price round out the listings in the “Kids Korner” on the Big Red Boat...Is it just me or does anyone else feel perturbed when shipboard drink prices outstrip those at your local strip mall? NO? Then how about a 20 ounce bottle of Lemon Arizona Iced Tea....just $2.50 on the Big Red Boat...! Wines by the glass will set you back from $3.50 to $5.50 for a Robert Mondavi Pinot Noir....but on the whole cocktails are not overpriced here...running about $3.50 and $3.75 each...with premium spirits carrying a charge of $3.95....but the Line knows its customers and knows this is not the vodka stinger crowd...not the Tanqueray and tonic bunch...nope....domestic beers here go for $2.95a bottle...imported brews can be yours for a mere 55 cents more...or a NON-ALCOHOLIC O’Douls costs you just $2.75! So once your luck has run out of that noisy barn like Lucky Star Lounge, Casino and shopping center...truck on over to the heroes & Legends Pub...a room guaranteed to remind you of the bar near Gate 44 in the American Airlines terminal at Los Angeles airport...only not quite as nice...Still not sated in your quest for junked up spaces? Then try the 300 seat Starlight Disco aft on Lounge Deck...I could go on to say......but NO...I think you know by now that this ship does not have my confidence....and she has a few more spaces to mention but if you want to know more, check out the line’s brochure...

There’s a LOT of food served here as well as a LOT of food available all day and all night long....Look for those decidedly American treats here...Hamburgers, cheeseburgers, hot dogs, fried chicken tenders... The line also offers an Italian dinner complete with your choice of minestre and paste, not to mention items as Italian as a steak...Don’t look for those tableside presentations that helped make the OCEANIC famous in her Home Lines days....they don’t do them...Food service here is totally mass market...they have it down to a science...so don’t try to special order here...and don’t look for a table for two...How’s the food? If it were a restaurant, I wouldn’t go back there...but remember...with about 1,500 people to be served on two cruises a week it’s no big deal if you don’t like it, there’s always someone else to take your place... Only in this ship you can be sure I will not be the one!!

Designed for occasional two class service on the Atlantic, the ship was given a wide range of cabin types ranging from the eight balconied apartments to inside quads below...During a 1993 refit a few cabins were given balconies...These are small rooms and though unoccupied when I saw them felt close and confining to me...I would hate to have to share one with three others for a few days. Of course most private quarters range somewhere in between....Some are quite big, proportioned generously enough that they can sleep five people....but the bathroom is big enough for one at a time...There is sufficient drawer and closet space for the average travelers but don’t overpack... and by all means bring your tank top! There’s no formality, so on “formal night” in this ship a gentleman can get by with a jacket and tie and a clean pair of slacks...Don’t forget your swimsuit and perhaps a bib. Oh yes...there is an adequate cabin TV system...my favorite entertainment in this ship.

Premier Cruises tries to snare the young middle class American family and since it’s not really cheap (a brother of mine is a physician and when I price out two cabins for him and his family of three kids he ALWAYS balks at the price for a one week vacation incluidng the “Big Red Boat” and hotel near or in Disney World). But many people do go for it and this ship is always packed...LOTS of kids, Lots of FAMILIES LOTS of noise, screaming screeching crying (and HELP...stop the ship I wanna get off)!

And NO I did not DARE enter the rooms developed for kids...the Astro Room...the Children’s Recreational Center on Continental Deck (and once a chapel), Pluto’s Playhouse, another such facility on Premier Deck aft, the Teen-Ager’s Space Station (for “Navigators and TeenCruisers”) and you can save your money and not bother to bet that I did NOT go near the Star Fighter Arcade...the “State of the Art video game room. Generally, there is no one here who is grand...no one really cares WHAT and I bet there are plenty of people who wish you would wear nothing as long as you’re “hot looking”...this is not the ship where designer costumes reign...PLENTY of tank tops and tshirts over short pants here....By the way...rereading the Daily Program for a Wednesday...”Welcome to Nassau”, I counted NINETEEN instances where a dollar sign was used...nine of them in connection with drinks...like the $2.25 sixteen ounce draft beers at late night pizza time to $3.00 (only) for the drink of the day, the Margarita, mentioned specifically twice in the program! Another sign of the line’s devotion to sales is this entry in the daily program “6:30 - 11:30 pm DUTY FREE SHOPS OPEN. Select perfume gift sets 20% off, one day only! Select cosmetics 50%off, one day only! Designer T-shirts buy 2 & get matching socks or sun visor free!” I’ve said too much already and I’ll say no more!

Three and four days cruises from Port Canaveral, that oasis of culture so near the Floridian swamps is where you board this ship for one of her three or four night cruises to the Bahamas...Three night jaunts take in Nassau and Port Lucaya where the ship lies at anchor, four night trips include a day at sea when you get to spend! spend! spend! So many are the opportunities to buy...Expect a LOT of sales pressure from shore excursion, dive staff, boutique staff...hey...expect a lot of pressure to buy stuff, spend money and rate everyone and everything highly...A couple of waiters told me that anything less than a rating of “excellent” could get them fired...Whether or not it’s true...and in some ships it IS, I think it’s terrible to put pressure on passengers to score everyone “excellent”.

You might think I had long been one of the OCEANIC’s greatest admirers....but this is not true...I never considered her the equal of Italian Line’s ships...and she wasn’t...unable to rival them in food and service...or even decor...Yet over the years I made my peace with her, coming to develop a genuine fondness for this big lady. I realize the extent of the visceral attack I make on her here yet I find no one at Premier willing to admit the reasons why they visited such a trashing aboard a hugely successful cruise ship. She has changed, thoroughly for the worse and I do not applaud them for it. Having said that, I did find the ship quite clean, and the crew generally cordial and reasonably conversant in the English language.....BUT, Visiting this ship made me glad I don’t have children because I don’t think I would appreciate cruising on their level. SO when a cruise line...any cruise line oversells its product, and I believe this one does...(they even employ a bow on likeness of the NORWAY and her VERY identifiable winged funnels as their “Big Red Boat” logo....I wonder why....an observer has the obligation to criticize and criticize I do). In my opinion this is a horrifying cruise experience but I am in a small minority and SOMEONE or many someones must like this stuff...Someone liked it enough to buy the company....and retain the ship on her present course for another year.